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How offensive is the French word "femmelette" considered to be? I know it's used to describe a weak or overly sensitive male, so I assume it's mostly used to offend males, but is it considered to be offensive to females, too?

I know it technically translates to "a weak woman," so would it be considered kind of stupid for a female to use that word? Is it like an equivalent to the English word "pussy"? I hear females use that word to describe males or females all of the time, and I've never heard anyone say it was stupid for a female to say that even though it's a word that's generally referred to females.

Thanks in advance.

user8611261
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2 Answers2

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It’s vulgar, and yes the english word to translate it could be « pussy »

Per the description; it’s tagged for a men acting like a women

Fig. Homme qui a des manières féminines. C'est une vraie > femmelette, comment supportera-t-il les fatigues de la > guerre s'il est appelé à l'armée ?

In Canadian French it’s not much used. « Feluette » is more used or even « tapette » which is more vulgar.

  • Feluette is a derivate word from fluet.

The urban dictionnary description:

feluette similar to "moumoune", meaning wuss or weakling. Force un peu, maudite feluette!

  • tapette is more vulgar, as the primary meaning is a vulgar word that mean a homosexual, but it can be used to taunt someone else like feluette or femmelette.

In a conversation these words can be used for taunting (« narguer »), so the usage meaning can vary on the situation, but it’s still vulgar in any case.

yagmoth555
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  • Thank you. Can you explain the exact meanings and usages of the other words you mentioned, "feluette," "tapette," and "narguer"? Would it be completely weird for someone speaking French, not Canadian French, to use them? – user8611261 Sep 13 '19 at 00:49
  • @user8611261 Yes I will edit, for narguer it's more the act to tell femmelette, I didn't found the correct english word to translate it, it kinda mean "taunt" – yagmoth555 Sep 13 '19 at 01:32
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    From the perspective of a European French native speaker: tapette and femmelette are also very common here, but not "feluette". You can also find a less offensive word chochotte (not sure if it is used in Canadian French). – Greg Sep 13 '19 at 02:47
  • @Greg What's the exact definition/usage of "chochotte"? – user8611261 Sep 13 '19 at 03:52
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    Chochotte qualifies someone (more often a boy, even small children) who acts effeminate and avoids or refuses to do certain "manly" things. It is often used with the phrase faire sa chochotte (=to act like a sissy). Ex: "arrête de faire ta chochotte et viens te baigner, l'eau n'est pas trop froide !" I'd rate it as less offensive than femmelette. – Greg Sep 13 '19 at 04:06
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    It's not “men acting like a women”, it's meant acting like a stereotypical woman who is weak because she's a woman. It's inherently sexist against women. – Gilles 'SO nous est hostile' Sep 13 '19 at 06:46
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    I wouldn't say it's vulgar. It's informal, but it's not a curse word. If you're in elementary school and your teacher hears you say "femmelette", you're not particularly in trouble (as opposed to "merde" or "putain" for instance) – Teleporting Goat Sep 13 '19 at 07:56
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    @TeleportingGoat There are not many schools you'd be in trouble for saying merde and not many in the south of France for saying putain. But nowadays when teachers are asked to be particularly careful about all sexist discrimination femelette would never go unnoticed, an if it did then the teacher would be the one who could get in trouble. – None Sep 13 '19 at 10:41
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    @Gilles It's sexist, but it mean effiminé too, which mean something beyond the fact that a women can be weak. – yagmoth555 Sep 13 '19 at 12:58
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    @Gilles I personally would disagree on the meaning. In my opinion "-lette" just means small/weak in general. It's like saying "jupette" or "cigarette" is a small/short jupe or cigar because it's a jupe/cigar. – Pepper Sep 13 '19 at 14:37
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    @Pepper No, it's different. If femmelette was applied to women, it would be the same. But femmelette is mostly applied to men. – Gilles 'SO nous est hostile' Sep 13 '19 at 14:49
  • It's applied to men in the sense "men should be ashamed of acting like women", so of course it doesn't make sense to apply it to women. While I agree that one could assume what you meant, it's subjective, in my opinion – Pepper Sep 13 '19 at 14:59
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    I would argue that a word like "pussy", because it can applied to women, is inherently sexist since it associates negative characteristics directly to the gender itself (cowardice for example) that even other women should be ashamed of. – Pepper Sep 13 '19 at 15:03
  • Je ne partage pas ton avis sur l'emploi au Canada mais j'imagine que c'est une question de quelle région on habite et d'âge etc. Dans mon expérience, femmelette est bien plus courant que feluette, que je n'ai jamais employé de ma vie même si je connais le mot. Moumounne est probablement le plus courant dans mon coin. –  Sep 13 '19 at 19:00
  • @personne Sa doit dépendre alors, oui. Mes grand-parents viennent de gaspé, et il ont des ancêtres acadien, donc peut-etre plus une expression qui vient de la alors :) – yagmoth555 Sep 13 '19 at 19:04
  • @Laure I didn't say "school", I said elementary school. I meant that for a 7-9 year old kid, if you say swear wordslike "pute" or "connard" you can get in trouble, with your teacher at shcool or with your parents if you're at home. I should have said it differently to be more specific. Of course students in lycée won't get in trouble for saying "merde". But I doubt a kid will get a remark from teachers or parents if he say "femelette". – Teleporting Goat Sep 18 '19 at 12:16
  • @TeleportingGoat I had perfectly understood we were both talking about elementary school children. Even 50 years ago no teacher in the south of France would have raised an eyebrow for putain, let alone parents, everyone uses it. Merde can be heard almost everywhere inside as well as outside the classroom (even said by teachers), sometimes with an apology as an afterthought, but no one gets punished for saying it. – None Sep 18 '19 at 13:01
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    Dans le midi de la France, par exemple, ponctuer ses phrases de : « Putain ! Con ! » est très fréquent alors qu’en région parisienne on dira « merde » plus facilement..... If teachers or parents don't tell their kids off for saying femelette, considering it is a personal and sexist insult, then they are not doing their jobs as educators, and for a teacher it is a professional mistake. – None Sep 18 '19 at 13:10
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    Je confirme pour ma part l’utilisation de feluette dans ma partie du Québec (pas acadienne du tout). – Pas un clue Sep 20 '19 at 12:38
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Femmelette is offensive because it's an insult in two parts. The -lette suffix is a diminutive, saying that the person is less than a femme. And it builds on femme (i.e. “woman”), saying that the person is inferior for being a woman.

If femmelette was the feminine version of *hommelet, it would merely be an insult. But *hommelet* doesn't exist. Using femmelette is intrinsically sexist.

(My perspective is from France. Some dialects may use the word more or less, but the offensiveness is cross-dialectal.)

Gilles 'SO nous est hostile'
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    I don't want to raise any controversy here: this answer is right. But a woman that looks or behave like a man is sometimes referred to as a “fomme” (or perhaps “fhomme”?) in Quebec. This hasn't made it to any dictionary I know, it is uncommon even in Quebec, but would it surf a wave at some point in the future, I believe it could be a legitimate masculine version of “femmelette”, even though it's pointing to a different sexist stereotype (roughness of men instead of weakness of women). – Pas un clue Sep 13 '19 at 12:26
  • @Montéedelait Huh. I've never heard or read that word, it hasn't made its way to France. Is it even “un fhomme” or “une fhomme”? The spelling fhomme is somewhat transparent (at least if you don't get sidetrack thinking the F is a typo) but I'm not sure I'd have understood if I'd heard it. – Gilles 'SO nous est hostile' Sep 13 '19 at 12:39
  • Peut-être [œ̃n fɔm] serait-il approprié? :~) Dans mon monde on dit «une fhomme»... – Pas un clue Sep 13 '19 at 12:42
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    It is definitely sexist in the sense that it infers acting like a (weak) woman is a bad thing, to be ashamed of, but interpreting it as "a woman being weak for being a woman" is an extra step. In my opinion there is no meaning of causality in any of the "-lette" words. (noisette, maisonette, pincette, etc) – Pepper Sep 13 '19 at 14:53
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    Hommasse is an adjective, not a noun, yet it is offensive and used to described a woman who acts or looks like a man. And hommelet would sound like either homme laid or omelette ! – Erwan Legrand Sep 13 '19 at 15:01
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    @Montéedelait I was curious about it and fomme and hemme can be found in the wiktionnaire, no definitions. Urban dictionary has fomme but the definition given doesn't match yours. Wiktionnaire gives a quotation form a Quebec women's studies journal. And the terms were apparently used by the French writer Françoise Dorin in 2007, so they must be known in some circles this side of the Pond. – None Sep 13 '19 at 15:09
  • @Laure Good find. So the word would exist in both genders in some circles, and as a noun to designate some mild sort of hermaphrodicity. Maybe the (pejorative) acception of the people I know is not to be the final one, who knows? – Pas un clue Sep 13 '19 at 15:26
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    @Laure Une autre définition informelle, plus près de celle que j’ai fournie, datant de 2006. – Pas un clue Sep 13 '19 at 16:37
  • @Montéedelait Les mots en train de se créer et de se chercher, c'est intéressant. C'est visiblement parti du Québec, et c'est aussi intéressant de voir que le français n'est pas un phénomène hexagonal et peut-être est-il plus vivant au Québec qu'en France ! – None Sep 13 '19 at 17:14
  • @Laure Pas un phénomène STRICTEMENT hexagonal. Je crois qu'il faut encore considérer la France comme une région particulièrement effervescente de la Francophonie... – Pas un clue Sep 13 '19 at 17:24
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    Oui, tout à fait, bien sûr. Mais les Français sont souvent très coincés sur la langue... peur du néologisme et de la création langagière. – None Sep 13 '19 at 17:50
  • "ette" is just a diminutive, which is not intrinsically insulting, it can even be affectionate. But in the context of an insult it does add another layer of insult instead. Especially in the context of sexist insults. –  Sep 13 '19 at 21:20