How do native English speakers respond to "Thank you"?

Question

In my school and university I was taught to say "Not at all" or "Don't mention it" in response to "Thank you!". Now I rarely hear these phrases used, but rather something like "You're welcome", "It's OK", "My pleasure", or "No problem".

My real life conversation experience is very poor. I often listen to some English learning podcasts, and watch some films in English. So I listen to dialogs, which are probably not from the modern real life world.

How do native English speakers tend to respond to "Thank you!" now? What I should care about, when choosing from the available options?

Related: http://english.stackexchange.com/questions/1265/is-not-at-all-still-alive-and-doing-well That question is more specific than this, but its answers are relevant for this too. — Jonik, Sep 04 '10 at 11:10
Not at all is just one of the ways to reply to thank you. — apaderno, Sep 04 '10 at 13:03
For providing an example of a good, basic question: Thank you. — Goodbye Stack Exchange, Sep 04 '10 at 15:05
@rem, you mention that you "watch some films in English. So I listen to dialogs, which are probably not from modern real life world". Don't discount the influence of entertainment on everyday language usage. ;) — Chris Noe, Sep 04 '10 at 21:22
Heard commonly recently is "No worries" which originated in Australia. — OneProton, Sep 19 '10 at 02:08
@Chris Noe: I agree completely. For the most part, dialog from TV and movies are fairly realistic. (And in cases where they aren't, they are still influential. People appreciate people who quote movies) — Adam, Mar 04 '11 at 05:14
An HR rep came to our office to give us the etiquette of email, and her response to this quesiton was to not reply with anything at all if someone sent an email saying "thank you", as it would create clutter in peoples' inboxes. — OghmaOsiris, Jun 23 '11 at 15:08
@OghmaOsiris, Agree that for an email, the professional answer is often silence. I appreciate the value of their time. — Scott McIntyre, Jun 23 '11 at 22:00
As an aside, I think the reason 'Not at all' and 'Don't mention it' were suggested as responses is because they are closer to the literal meanings of those same responses in other languages (c.f. 'de nada' in Spanish, 'de rien' in French, perhaps most accurately translated as 'of nothing' in English). 'You're welcome' and 'no problem' are the most common responses I've heard in Canada, which are more awkward constructions in other languages when directly translated (although there is 'pas de problème' in French, and 'bitte' in German.). — Hannele, Nov 24 '11 at 22:56
Just say “you’re welcome”; anything else risks being taken wrong by some parties. — tchrist, Apr 04 '12 at 17:50
See http://english.stackexchange.com/questions/146671/when-should-no-problem-replace-youre-welcome-as-a-response-to-thank-you — Pacerier, Aug 26 '15 at 11:02
I’m voting to close this question because it is a better fit on InterpersonalSkills.SE. — Edwin Ashworth, Sep 15 '20 at 14:31
The Chick-Fil-A fast food chain prides itself on customer service. They instruct their employees to respond to "thank you" with "it's my pleasure," never "you're welcome."
The idea is that they are there to serve, not to be appreciated ... and in fact they appreciate you. — Roister, May 29 '23 at 21:31

cori · Accepted Answer · 2010-09-05T12:28:02.730

89

In common conversation in the US Midwest I rarely hear "Not at all" or "Don't mention it." "No problem" is very common, and "You're welcome" is also pretty well-used.

My personal usage:

I use "Not at all," "Don't mention it," and "No problem" when the activity I'm being thanked for was really no big deal. I use "My pleasure" when emphasizing that I'm happy to be of assistance (often in a customer service context), and "You're welcome" when the action prompting the thanks was a little bit of a bother. In essence I use different phrases to indicate how "thanks-worthy" the activity was.

That's probably not common usage, though.

EDIT

I think I misrepresented what I originally meant, so here's a little clarification.

If someone thanks me for something I always do (for instance I always cook dinner in our house) then I would say "No problem" or "My pleasure" depending on context. If I did a chore that was someone else's responsibility, I would say "You're welcome" even if I was happy to have done it, because it took an extra effort on my part, not because it was a "bother."

edited Sep 05 '10 at 12:28

answered Sep 04 '10 at 10:07

cori

3,416

1

I know a person living in United States of America, and in 10 years she always replied with you are welcome, but not because I was bothering her. – apaderno Sep 04 '10 at 11:33
3

@kiamlaluno - While I cannot speak for everyone in the US, I will tend to use more formal language when speaking to non-native speakers of English. Perhaps the person you know does the same? – ssakl Sep 04 '10 at 12:54
@ssakl: The point is that if she would use you are welcome to mean that I was bothering her, then she should have never said you are welcome. What I meant is that I agree with cori when he says that what he reported is not common usage. – apaderno Sep 04 '10 at 13:02
@kiamlaluno - Thank you for the clarification. I misunderstood your original comment. – ssakl Sep 04 '10 at 13:20
I think I misrepresented what I originally meant - I didn't mean so much "bothering" as much as that the action took some additional effort on my part. Edited above to clarify. But yes, probably very specific to me... – cori Sep 05 '10 at 12:28
1

@Cori: +1 nice explanation, it was interesting to read it. – Roman Oct 27 '10 at 08:39
I would say it's the same over here on the east coast. The prominence of television and movies has resulted in more homogeneous dialog across the country. – Adam Mar 04 '11 at 05:16
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I am from Pakistan and my boss has worked in Pakistan and USA. Today, I replied back to him using "Not at all." He came to my room and asked me what it meant. – Sep 10 '15 at 10:53
As I say, my usage is probably not exactly typical :-) – cori Sep 10 '15 at 19:42

score 19 · Answer 2 · answered Sep 04 '10 at 14:21

I don't think you'll have any issues with any of these replies in normal conversation, so I wouldn't let it concern you. There is a relatively new study that claims people who say things such as "no problem" in reply to "thank you," are essentially saying that the thanker's issue was somehow beneath the responder, but I doubt if anyone actually feels like that. It's all a big to-do about nothing, really.

If someone thanks you, just be sincere about it--show that you appreciate their acknowledgement of whatever it is that you have done for them in whatever fashion you find comfortable. Heck, use Spanish; say, "de nada."

+1 for being pragmatic. Sincerity and e.g. a smile will matter much more than what exact words you utter in such a situation. — Jonik, Sep 04 '10 at 14:30

score 16 · Answer 3 · edited Dec 27 '12 at 18:41

16

"You're welcome" was taught to me in school (NW America) as polite, but "no problem" and "don't mention it" are common between friends. My tech support guy always texts " np" after I thank him for fixing my computer at work. It seems self-effacing and generous to me.

edited Dec 27 '12 at 18:41

James Waldby - jwpat7

66,660

answered Sep 06 '10 at 08:12

Picturepocket

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score 15 · Answer 4 · edited Jun 15 '20 at 07:40

15

How native English speakers tend to respond to "Thank you!" now? What I should care about, when choosing from the available options?

In a shop, if the assistant says "thank you", I usually say "thank you" back to them. Another thing is that quite a lot of the time it isn't necessary to reply to "thank you" with any particular "response" phrase. For example in a dialogue like this:

A: Here's your key.

B: Thank you.

A: See you next week.

there isn't really any need to say any set phrase after the "thank you". I think in normal English discourse we often don't reply to "thank you" in any special way. (I don't have any statistics about this, but that is my strong impression.)

edited Jun 15 '20 at 07:40

Community

1

answered Sep 04 '10 at 13:21

Why is it unnecessary to reply to "thank you"? Not on a grammar level, but a manners level. – kajaco Sep 04 '10 at 14:44
@kajaco: that's a good question, I think the phrasing of the answer is not ideal there. – Sep 04 '10 at 14:50
8

When omitting a reply to "thank you", I've seen people smile instead of saying something, essentially responding non-verbally. Not responding in any way seems somewhat rude to me. – Goodbye Stack Exchange Sep 04 '10 at 15:08
5

@Neil Fein: not responding in any way to what someone else says is usually considered rude whether they have said "thank you" or anything else. – Sep 04 '10 at 15:11
1

@NeilFein I assume "See you next week" would be said with a smile in the example dialogue above. – Chan-Ho Suh Aug 18 '12 at 17:03
1

+1 for mentioning "thank you" as a possible response to "thank you" and also mentioning that sometimes you don't need to respond directly. – Chan-Ho Suh Aug 18 '12 at 17:06
@Chan-HoSuh - A smile, or perhaps some other non-verbal acknowledgement. (A polite nod, or bowing one's head, etc; they all mean, more or less, "I heard you and send nice happy nonverbal thoughts in your general direction.") – Goodbye Stack Exchange Aug 18 '12 at 18:26

Kate Gregory · Answer 5 · 2011-11-24T22:17:46.467

12

When I first started travelling on business to the US (from Canada), I felt a little miffed that my "Thankyou"s were not being acknowledged. Not with "you're welcome", not with "happy to" or "no trouble at all" or even "no problem". Never mind a "thank YOU" response. Then I noticed that, almost all the time, there was a little "uh-huh". At first that irritated me more, and then I developed a mental translation between "uh-huh" and "you're welcome" and my business trips became less stressful.

I don't think anyone will find you odd if you say "you're welcome" to each thankyou. Don't draw any conclusions about people (their mood, whether they are polite, whether they were raised well, their opinion of your gratitude for their act) by what they say to your thankyous. It varies wildly.

edited Nov 24 '11 at 22:17

answered Jun 03 '11 at 14:10

Kate Gregory

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you're very welcome! – Kate Gregory Jun 03 '11 at 14:45
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"uh-huh" esp. Am. syn. "you're welcome" [c.2011] :) – Kris Jan 04 '12 at 09:14
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I have a suspicion you are saying "thank you" too profusely (as compared to Americans). If you thank Americans in situations where they aren't necessarily expecting thanks, you will get an "uh-huh". Such situations include holding doors open. – Chan-Ho Suh Aug 18 '12 at 17:08
3

@Chan-HoSuh: I don't think you can claim there is an American standard of how frequently to say "thank you". In my experience, it varies as dramatically by region as it does across the Canada-US border. – Sam Lisi Sep 07 '12 at 10:44

score 9 · Answer 6 · edited Dec 27 '12 at 18:44

9

The only one that is fairly standard is "You're welcome" the others, in my opinion, are just variants of the same sentiment. That is, it is customary to demur somewhat and make it as if the thing you are being thanked for wasn't worthy of the thanks. It's weird, but who knows where these things get started?

edited Dec 27 '12 at 18:44

James Waldby - jwpat7

66,660

answered Sep 04 '10 at 18:17

JohnFx

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Thursagen · Answer 7 · 2011-06-23T11:29:42.630

9

The best option is still "you're welcome", and Wiktionary defines it as:

1907 (as reply to “thank you”).

If you're not satisfied, there is the alternative of "My pleasure", which is my personal favourite.

edited Jun 23 '11 at 11:29

answered Jun 23 '11 at 10:19

Thursagen

41,919

but if i reply only welcome, so – Pir Abdul Jun 23 '11 at 10:23
These are only the most formal replies though. ("You're welcome" can work for formal and informal situations.) In British English, I very commonly use "No prob(lem)" or "No worries". If you're trying to be particularly self-effacing, "It was nothing" can also work. – Noldorin Jun 24 '11 at 01:27
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No one in the UK says "you're welcome" unless they're trying to annoy everyone by sounding american – adolf garlic Feb 06 '13 at 09:46
What does etymology 1907 mean? – Pacerier Dec 23 '13 at 17:05

score 9 · Answer 8 · answered Jun 23 '11 at 22:57

9

Some other straightforward, professional (possibly terse) options not already mentioned:

Certainly.

Or,

Of course.

Or, already mentioned in longer form, but sometimes shortened to this:

Happy to.

I think that all of these might be more likely to be spoken than written, however.

answered Jun 23 '11 at 22:57

Nicole

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In that vein, "sure" or "sure thing". – Chan-Ho Suh Aug 18 '12 at 17:14

score 8 · Answer 9 · edited Jan 04 '12 at 06:37

8

No worries is very common in Australia.

edited Jan 04 '12 at 06:37

answered Jun 03 '11 at 23:10

CesarGon

3,595

I first heard this, sounding so exotic, from Brits in the early aughts (2000's). But now I hear Americans using it a lot (I live in the US and speak AmE). I might use 'no worries' but it feels a little newish to say it; I'm having a hard time articulating exactly when it is appropriate beyond 'informal'. Maybe just an alternative to 'no problem'. – Mitch Sep 26 '18 at 13:30

score 6 · Answer 10 · answered Jan 02 '11 at 01:23

6

My most common response are "Certainly" and "My pleasure" but I sometimes use the less formal "De nada" (I grew up in an area with strong Hispanic roots...), "Sure", "No problem" and of course "You're welcome".

Those you suggest are not in my production vocabulary, but I would find them perfectly acceptable.

answered Jan 02 '11 at 01:23

dmckee --- ex-moderator kitten

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“My privilege” strikes me as more elegant than “My pleasure”. – James Waldby - jwpat7 Dec 27 '12 at 18:47

score 4 · Answer 11 · answered Sep 04 '10 at 16:10

4

"You're welcome" is the only correct response to "Thank you" in American English as far as I'm concerned. It grates on my nerves to have someone respond to me using "no problem".

answered Sep 04 '10 at 16:10

Dennis Williamson

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What's the problem with "no problem"? – b.roth Sep 04 '10 at 17:28
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@Bruno: I perceive it as dismissive and diminishing. When I say "thank you" it's sincere. To me "you're welcome" carries a matching sincerity. If I thought something someone did was "no problem" I might not even say "thank you". – Dennis Williamson Sep 04 '10 at 18:03
8

do you always take the idioms of conversational formality at their literal meaning? – nohat Sep 06 '10 at 18:48
@nohat: no, but that doesn't mean that they don't carry some literal meaning. – Dennis Williamson Sep 06 '10 at 21:27
@Bruno Rothgiesser - See my comment to moioci's answer. I'm not willing to say "You're welcome" is the only acceptable response, but "No problem" bugs me too. – T.E.D. Jun 03 '11 at 16:19
3

The most annoying possible response to "thank you" is of course yet another "thank you". It demands its own response, descending into infinite recursion. It’s annoying and stupid, but not intentionally rude. – tchrist Apr 04 '12 at 17:50
'Correct'? That's not a language concept. That's a concept of (what you think is) politeness. People say all sorts of things naturally and that's what the OP is looking for. "should' might come into it sociolinguistics, but 'correct' is just not linguistics. – Mitch Sep 26 '18 at 13:35

score 4 · Answer 12 · edited Jun 23 '11 at 11:53

4

This depends on your professional setting, but to keep reasonably friendly, often I will simply reply:

No worries.

Or,

Any time.

Or, both:

No worries. Any time.

edited Jun 23 '11 at 11:53

Kit Z. Fox

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answered Jun 23 '11 at 10:44

Grant Thomas

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score 4 · Answer 13 · answered Sep 26 '18 at 11:51

I was born in Britain the middle of the last century and learned to say. "Don't mention it." The American response "You're welcome" is now common in Britain and I sometimes use it. Since some acknowledgment seems appropriate I often say "OK". I have heard, "You bet" only from Americans however.

score 3 · Answer 14 · answered Sep 18 '10 at 06:21

3

I have read that many in the UK find "You're welcome" grating, preferring the "Not at all" kind of response. I find "No problem" annoying, for reasons I can't quite verbalize.

answered Sep 18 '10 at 06:21

moioci

4,678

1

Same here with "no problem". I think the reason is that it implies that there was perhaps actually a problem there. If what I'm saying "thank you" for should in no way shape or form have actually been a problem for them (eg: Doing their job competently), then it just seems rude to get a "no problem". OTOH: If it was actually indisputably a problem for them (eg: "Thank you for doing the Heimlich on me. I almost died."), then a "no problem" would be an appropriate and thoughtful thing to say. – T.E.D. Jun 03 '11 at 14:45
1

It's interesting and ironic that "no problem" strikes many, including me, as dismissive, because "don't mention it" or "not at all" (as well as French "pas de quoi" and Spanish "de nada") don't seem to strike anyone that way, even though they are, in literal terms, no less dismissive. – H Stephen Straight Jan 15 '13 at 20:42

Joe Phillips · Answer 15 · 2010-09-04T20:20:55.730

2

You're welcome!

or

Not a problem!

These are probably your most common and casual replies.

edited Sep 04 '10 at 20:20

answered Sep 04 '10 at 16:07

Joe Phillips

672

score 2 · Answer 16 · answered Jun 23 '11 at 10:17

2

You can use

You're welcome.

or

It was my pleasure.

or

It was nothing. I was happy to help.

There are others, but these will suffice.

answered Jun 23 '11 at 10:17

Robusto

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what about Most welcome? – Pir Abdul Jun 23 '11 at 10:42
1

@abdul You could use "You are most welcome." It has a warm yet slightly formal feel. Most welcome as a stand alone would sound a little odd, since it is not used much. And "You're most welcome" sounds a little strange too, probably because there is a slight emphasis on most that is difficult with a preceding contraction. – Kit Z. Fox Jun 23 '11 at 11:52

score 2 · Answer 17 · edited Aug 22 '12 at 08:57

2

You would do same for me.

Lesson taught by Guy Kawasaki.

edited Aug 22 '12 at 08:57

RegDwigнt

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answered Jun 23 '11 at 23:09

Stefan from Krakow

37

2

Who was Guy Kawasaki? And what authority should be given his answer? – StoneyB on hiatus Nov 18 '12 at 22:23
1

Context: Why you shouldn't say you're welcome....... – Pacerier Aug 26 '15 at 11:04

score 1 · Answer 18 · answered Feb 28 '18 at 07:30

1

A lot of times in casual conversations, I've seen people, simply nod or smile in response to a 'Thank You'. I think that's also acceptable.

answered Feb 28 '18 at 07:30

Ankit

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Cat812 · Answer 19 · 2019-01-09T09:40:21.337

1

I was born in Britain in 1960 and grew up hearing "You're welcome", "Not at all", "Don't mention it" and "My pleasure". I certainly didn't think of "You're welcome" as an Americanism, rather as the most standard response to "Thank you".

I have lived abroad since the early 1990s and, on a trip back to the UK last month (2018), I was struck by all the shop assistants responding to "Thank you" with "No problem" or "No worries". I was taken aback, since I hadn't expected them (or me) to be worrying about anything. Presumably it has become standard in British English over the past decade and no longer sounds offhand (as it does to me). The compensation is that in Britain the shopkeepers still call their customers "Darling", "Love", "Pet", or other terms of endearment, so I get a warm feeling that way instead.

edited Jan 09 '19 at 09:40

answered Jan 09 '19 at 09:24

Cat812

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See my comment to @CesarGon's answer about 'no worries'. – Mitch Jan 09 '19 at 14:35
@Mitch Yes, I saw it and was intrigued. I assumed "No worries" was an Americanism. My (British) husband just said he thought "You're welcome" was definitely an Americanism that he was reacting to decades ago while I thought it was perfectly standard British English. – Cat812 Jan 10 '19 at 15:17
Read Lynne Murphy's The Prodigal Tongue. Lots of examples of words that US/UK blames UK/US for but had been a US/UK invention or from somewhere else. – Mitch Jan 10 '19 at 16:26

How do native English speakers respond to "Thank you"?

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