I was just fooling around with this and found this reference for Objective-C from apple that seemed to work with clang for C++.
// Objective-C example
#include "TargetConditionals.h"
#if TARGET_OS_OSX
// Put CPU-independent macOS code here.
#if TARGET_CPU_ARM64
// Put 64-bit Apple silicon macOS code here.
#elif TARGET_CPU_X86_64
// Put 64-bit Intel macOS code here.
#endif
#elif TARGET_OS_MACCATALYST
// Put Mac Catalyst-specific code here.
#elif TARGET_OS_IOS
// Put iOS-specific code here.
#endif
https://developer.apple.com/documentation/apple-silicon/building-a-universal-macos-binary
I specifically checked to see if TARGET_CPU_ARM64 was defined in my header.
Hopefully this helps someone.