Is it OK to resolve your disagreement tomorrow?

Question

Found this article recently with the title Joy Comes in the Morning: It’s OK to Resolve Your Disagreement Tomorrow which addresses the commonly found advice "Don’t go to bed mad" extracted from Ephesians 4:26 (NASB)

Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger,

The author claims

the Bible never says, “don’t get mad” or even “don’t go to bed mad.”

Is that so?

Similar question.

Answer 1

Christians too may feel righteous anger, but Paul says do not sin. Christians do not allow anger to lead to uncontrolled outbursts, abusive speech, or violence. (Eph 4:31) Ps 4:4 advises God’s servants to express their concerns about the cause of their anger in private prayer to God.

do not let the sunset while you are still angry:

To the Jews, sunset marked the end of one day and the beginning of another. So Paul here warns against letting anger fester from one day to the next. In fact, Jesus warned his disciples not to continue to be wrathful with someone. (Mt 5:22) Prolonged anger may lead to bitterness, grudges, and divisions in personal relationships and within the congregation. (Leviticus 19:18; Psalms 36:4; Gal. 5:19-21) Paul offers practical counsel to help Christians resolve problems quickly, the same day if possible.​. Romans 12:17-21; Eph 4:2, 3.

Romans 12:17-21 NET

17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil; consider what is good before all people.[a] 18 If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all people.[b] 19 Do not avenge yourselves, dear friends, but give place to God’s wrath,[c] for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay,”[d] says the Lord. 20 Rather, if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him a drink; for in doing this you will be heaping burning coals on his head.[e] 21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Ephesians 4:2-3 NET

2 with all humility and gentleness,[a] with patience, putting up with[b] one another in love, 3 making every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.

Answer 2

Ephesians 4:26

Be angry, and yet do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger

Is it OK to resolve your disagreement tomorrow?

Yes, when the sun goes down, it is time to press the reset button. Replace anger with peace and get some restful sleep. There are always issues that cannot be resolved in a single day.

Jesus informed us in Matthew 6:34

Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

How do we get rid of the anger and worries before the night?

1 Peter 5:7

Cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you.

Let God deal with them. Trust God to handle them for you.

Is it OK to resolve your disagreement tomorrow?

Yes, definitely.

John 16:33

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

Answer 3

Let us be very careful as we tread carefully in this area. Let us examine other areas where certain ideal behaviors are enjoined but the Bible recognizes a practical sinful situation.

• Divorce: the Bible says we should not divorce (Mal 2:16, Matt 5:31, 32, Luke 16:18, Mark 10:4, Deut 22:19, 29, 1 Cor 7:12, etc) and then give rules about how divorce was to be done (Matt 19:3, 7, Deut 22:19, 24:1, Jer 3:1, etc)
• Anger and Hatred: The Bible condemns anger and hatred, 1 John 2:9, 11, 3:15, 4:20, Matt 5:22, Lev 19:17, Eph 4:26, but then gives a series a procedures for resolving hatred and anger.

Thus, the Bible sets out its heavenly ideals that because of the sinful people in a sinful world, are not achieved. However, the Bible is also practical and recognizes this very fact and so is helpful. For example, there is a practical hierarchy:

1. Love all people and hate no one:

• 1 John 3:9, 10, 15 - Anyone born of God refuses to practice sin, because God’s seed abides in him; he cannot go on sinning, because he has been born of God. By this the children of God are distinguished from the children of the devil: Anyone who does not practice righteousness is not of God, nor is anyone who does not love his brother. ... Everyone who hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that eternal life does not reside in a murderer.

2. Resolve anger/hatred quickly

• Eph 4:26 - “In your anger do not sin": Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry

3. Unresolved anger must be resolved when possible

• Matt 5:23, 24 - So if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.

4. Leave consequences to God

• Deut 32:35 - It is mine to avenge; I will repay. In due time their foot will slip; their day of disaster is near and their doom rushes upon them.”
• Heb 10:30 - For we know him who said, “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” and again, “The Lord will judge his people.”
• Rom 12:19 - Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.

These last instructions recognizes the practical reality that in a sinful world, some will never be resolved and must be left to God.