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I have to write an academic essay for school, and I was wondering if the use of the singular “they/them/their” would be accepted.

Which of these would be “formal” and “accepted” by teachers.

  • A) Someone forgot their hat. Make sure to give it back to them. (Singular they)

  • B) Someone forgot his hat. Make sure to give it back to him. (Universal “he”)

  • C) Someone forgot his or her hat. Make sure to give it back to him or her. (Use of both pronouns).

I am looking for the FORMAL way, since I am writing for school and shall write in a formal way!

Laurel
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Lou
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    A few minutes of searching through this site will lead you to a number of already existing questions and answers that deal with this matter. Note, however, that nothing that you will find on this site can tell you what your teachers regard as sufficiently formal; to find that out, you have to ask them. – jsw29 Jun 15 '20 at 17:24
  • All three examples violate basic English principles, as "give him/them back" is just wrong. – Hot Licks Jun 15 '20 at 17:35
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    All your examples should use it because it applies to the hat, not the person. "They" and "them" are used as singular personal pronouns to replace him, her, he, she. For that, it would be "give it back to them. – Weather Vane Jun 15 '20 at 17:36
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    Please don't change the question. SE is not a "live" tutorial site. – Weather Vane Jun 15 '20 at 17:39
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    Ok! Sorry I am new in this site! Besides, thank you for the information! Since I am not a native speaker, it is sometimes hard to find the right info :) – Lou Jun 15 '20 at 17:41
  • A hat was forgotten. It must be returned to its owner. – Jim Jun 15 '20 at 17:44
  • Jim's good suggestion side-steps the issue. They and them have become quite acceptable (maybe not to your teacher) to use as personal pronouns in the singular, but it isn't yet being replaced by they and them. – Weather Vane Jun 15 '20 at 17:46
  • Thank you so much for the help! I’ll ask my teacher if she’s okay with the singular they, but if not, I’ll use that alternative! – Lou Jun 15 '20 at 17:50
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    But don't forget that only your teacher and her students speak like that. If you need to speak English with natives, you'll see that opinions vary, but spoken practice is to use singular they when gender is not clear. Most English speakers don't even think they do it because they confuse writing with speech and believe they talk like they write. But spoken English is very different from what gets taught as "formal written English". – John Lawler Jun 15 '20 at 18:30
  • When I speak I use “they”, but when it comes to writing, I happen to be hesitating. Thank you very much for helping me! English is a very beautiful language – Lou Jun 15 '20 at 20:02
  • The issue here is that "the formal way" may vary from teacher to teacher. On my dissertation committee, I had one reader who loved singular "they" and one reader who marked up every instance and insisted on avoiding singular "they." (The third didn't care.) My gut feeling is that singular "they" is becoming accepted by more teachers and professors than it was even a decade ago, but gut feelings don't make good answers. – TaliesinMerlin Sep 23 '22 at 18:32

2 Answers2

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Discretion is the better part of valor.

Someone forgot a hat. Make sure to find the owner.

jimm101
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The following is the best choice:

Someone forgot their hat.

Use of the possesive pronoun "his" in "someone forgot his hat" is archaic. If the person under discussion question could be be woman, then use somthing like "they forgot their hat"

Toothpick Anemone
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