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A native English speaker said to her students that "I and my wife have ..." is wrong & we have to say "My wife and I have ..."

Why did she say it's wrong?

Tom
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  • Technically it's not wrong, what your teacher should have said that it is uncommon to place the pronoun before other people belonging to the same group. E.g "My parents and I", "Peter's friends and I", etc. The sentence she or he recommended is correct, and above all idiomatic. – Mari-Lou A Dec 05 '15 at 12:34

1 Answers1

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To a native English speaker, "My wife and I have" is more polite and respectful than "I and my wife have...." For more insight, check the links recommended in the comments above by Roaring Fish and Andrew Leach.

Mark Hubbard
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  • So, "He gave them to me and my wife" is impolite? and we have to say "... my wife and me" – Tom Dec 05 '15 at 10:27
  • It's less common to be fussy about your example, but yes, you should. – Steven Littman Dec 05 '15 at 12:42
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    @Tom No, your example of the prepositional phrase, "He gave them to me and my wife" would be just fine. Please keep in mind that I am not criticizing, just pointing out why my preference is for "My wife and I have." – Mark Hubbard Dec 05 '15 at 15:57
  • @Tom an easy escape route would be to simply say: "He gave them to us" But that observation is interesting, why is "He gave them to me and my wife" acceptable but when the subject is "I" it is customary to place the pronoun at the end? – Mari-Lou A Dec 05 '15 at 16:19
  • @Mari-Lou A That's a good question. The more I ponder it, the more I think it is probably idiomatic. – Mark Hubbard Dec 05 '15 at 18:08
  • Wait until Monday or Tuesday and post the question yourself! Sunday is never a good day for grammar type questions :) Do a bit of research first, look in the EL&U archives and see if anyone has asked that question before. – Mari-Lou A Dec 05 '15 at 20:02