How does God require us to treat non-Christians according to 2 John 1?

Question

I understand that the context for this passage was intended, by John the apostle, to warn the church about decievers that will come, and have the power to destroy us from the inside;

2 John 1:9-11 KJV

⁹ Whosoever transgresseth, and abideth not in the doctrine of Christ, hath not God. He that abideth in the doctrine of Christ, he hath both the Father and the Son. ¹⁰ If there come any unto you, and bring not this doctrine, receive him not into your house, neither bid him God speed: ¹¹ For he that biddeth him God speed is partaker of his evil deeds.

I'm capable of discerning, spiritually that is, people that are not truly followers of Christ. But considering how Jesus taught us to love (John 13: 34-35), who he taught us to love (Matthew 5:43-48), and how Jesus treated sinners (Mark 2 15-17), how does the above passage differ?

I know that both ways of acting toward others are important, correct, consistent, and compatible. But while on one hand we're told not to let them in our house, Matthew 5:41-42 tells us to walk with them. A mile even! Then afterward, we're told to give them what they ask of us.

So my question is this: According to the Word of God, how are we as Christians, rightly supposed to recognize these differences, and treat others accordingly, with the love and meekness of a child of God?

Could he moreso be warning against ideologies introduced to the church, and the church adopting them, and teaching them, that go against what the Bible teaches?

Passages mentioned:

John 13:34, 35 KJV

³⁴ A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. ³⁵ By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.

Mark 2:15-17 KJV

¹⁵ And it came to pass, that, as Jesus sat at meat in his house, many publicans and sinners sat also together with Jesus and his disciples: for there were many, and they followed him. ¹⁶ And when the scribes and Pharisees saw him eat with publicans and sinners, they said unto his disciples, How is it that he eateth and drinketh with publicans and sinners? ¹⁷ When Jesus heard it, he saith unto them, They that are whole have no need of the physician, but they that are sick: I came not to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.

Matthew 5:41-48 KJV

⁴¹ And whosoever shall compel thee to go a mile, go with him twain. ⁴² Give to him that asketh thee, and from him that would borrow of thee turn not thou away. ⁴³ Ye have heard that it hath been said, Thou shalt love thy neighbour, and hate thine enemy. ⁴⁴ But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; ⁴⁵ That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust. ⁴⁶ For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? do not even the publicans the same? ⁴⁷ And if ye salute your brethren only, what do ye more than others? do not even the publicans so? ⁴⁸ Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.

Answer 1

In Matthew 10 Jesus sends out the 12 disciples and in Luke 10 He sends out the 72. In both accounts the disciples are instructed on what to bring with them as well as how to discern an appropriate house to stay in at each city they visit.

This demonstrates the pattern undertaken in those days of what we might call itinerant preachers nowadays. Evangelists would go from city to city bringing the gospel message and most often their lodging was provided for them by hospitable folks in whatever city or town they were preaching in.

The letter in question, 2 John, is the flip side of the instructions that Jesus gave the disciples when He sent them out. John writes to the matriarch of a particular household ("The elder unto the elect lady and her children") and cautions her against offering hospitality to anyone who comes preaching a different gospel and a different Jesus.

Lodging such a false teacher and especially sending them forth with a blessing (Godspeed) makes one a partaker in their evil deed of preaching a false Christ who is not come in the flesh.

This letter is not a prescription for how individuals or churches should treat unbelievers but it is about reception and support for false teachers.

Answer 2

God gave us Scripture in the form of human texts written 2,000 years ago, so determining appropriate genre and establishing the author's context matters a great deal in proper interpretation, in order that we Bible readers can let God speak more clearly to His children today in our daily life circumstances when interacting with all sorts of people, ranging from those 1) hostile to God, 2) hypocrites, and 3) enemies in sheep clothing in the church, to those 4) seeking God, and 5) already followers of Jesus.

When Jesus was on earth, He spoke and interacted with people in all 5 categories (and more; I just want to identify 5 in this answer), and a very small part of how Jesus did this is available to us in the New Testament as our only reliable textual witness. And YES, Jesus did have strong words for #1 (ex. Matt 20:22-37), #2 (ex. Matt 6:1-34) and #3 (ex. Matt 7:15-20, Matt 24:11-13), even to #5 (such as warning to Peter "Get behind me, Satan", Matt 16:23), but mostly compassionate words for #4 (ex. the Beatitudes in Matt 5:3-12, to children in Matt 19:14, etc.), especially when they were being misled by the official teachers of the day (the Pharisees, the Scribes, and the Sadducees).

All of Jesus's words and actions toward people in the 5 categories are consistent with love and truth, as truth is inseparable in a Christian love; Jesus always speaks truth in love. Godly love is protective as well as compassionate, it should not degenerate into permissiveness or mere saccharine feelings. An act of love is premeditated in the mind by our letting God's Truth (mediated partly by reading Scripture) to soak our consciousness in such a way that we perceive the Truth of our circumstances correctly (i.e. having wisdom) so as to generate the appropriate loving action. When Jesus had strong words and did strong actions toward people in categories #1, #2, and #3, God's Truth united with God's Love led him to righteous anger at seeing the people in categories #4 and #5 were being led astray. Following Jesus, the Church carries on the mission to discern true doctrines (separating them from false doctrines) so that believers and non-believers alike have a clear guidance to form their actions toward the True God in heaven.

Non-Christians can be of the #1, #2, #3, and #4 categories, so our words and actions should imitate how Jesus spoke and approached them. Thus, we read:

• 2 John 1:9-11 as prescribed church action for wolf in sheep clothing (category #3). Yes, as you suggested Jesus did warn us against ideologies introduced to the church, for the church to recognize them as false, and to teach only Biblically consistent doctrines to hearers within the church's influence. The strongest indication of this is Jesus's strong word in Matt 23:13 and Matt 24:4-5.
• John 13:34-35 applies especially for brotherly love among already followers of Christ (category #5), consistent with another Jesus's commandment how among brothers & sisters in Christ we need to forgive more (Matt 18:21-22)
• Mark 2:15-17 is a recounting of how Jesus caused scandal among religious leaders by fellowshipping and associating with what the society labels "sinners", but who in reality were still undecided and at least open to God (category #4). To those "sinners" Jesus's words and actions were perceived as compassionate invitation from God
• Matt 5:41-48 is also for seekers (category #4) as a way for showing God's stubbornness to save the lost through persistent forgiveness, mercy, and serving heart in the face of unloving imposition of power on believers by those that are not necessarily evil but just spiritually blind, culminating in how Jesus himself offered forgiveness from the cross to his enemies. (See my interpretation on this passage).

CONCLUSION: I hope by being sensitive to the various categories of audience that Jesus (and later, the apostles and the Church) spoke to and interacted with (as recorded in the Bible), we can also be more sensitive to the category of the person we are dealing with, by adjusting appropriately our own speech and action so we can better communicate the loving truth God has for them, with an eye to sharing the gospel and inviting them to be Jesus's followers and disciples, as all believers are priests who are commanded to act as Jesus to them, especially the lost. At the same time we need to act sternly (while still in love) with those who are trying (consciously or not) to lead people astray from the Truth.